Sometimes, I just want to make silly mistakes that lead to big problems. I want to sit back and watch my own world fall apart. I want to be the one who cries first when something happens, the one who demands, complains, and blames. I want to be the innocent victim of my own mess.
This careful life is tiring. It drains my energy to always be in control, always be composed.
Sometimes, I wish to let go of everything—just float aimlessly, without swimming, without trying to survive. Like I’m in the middle of the sea, not fighting, just existing.
At night, I lie awake, staring into the darkness. That’s my kind of meditation. In those moments, it feels like I’m the only one left in the world. The silence is comforting, and a part of me hopes it never ends.
But the sun always rises. And with it begins another day of this careful life.
TheSparklingWords // Anushree Vaishnav
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